Will I Ever Love Again?
by SmokinItDude
Summary: Upon moving to New York to fulfill her dreams of becoming a successful writer, Aria's relationship with Ezra begins falling apart. What happens when the infamous Jason DiLaurentis re-enters her life?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Okay, so, I wanted to experiment with a Jaria (Jason/Aria) story. I really adored their hot chemistry in the show! I have normally written Spoby fics, so I decided to try out a new pairing. I've really lost interest in Ezria after how the writers destroyed him in season 4. Ezra became such a deceitful character. I thought he was such an honest, good guy until how the writers decided to randomly destroy him. Now, I would much rather see Aria with Jake or Jason. Maybe even Wes! Anyways, here's my story.**

Chapter 1

New York City—it was a place where so many people's dreams came true... and also died. Aria Montgomery had a mix of that. Majoring in English at NYU was always her biggest dream, but a part of them dream involved being happily married to her first love, Ezra Fitz. She always imagined growing old with him, and having an easy, loving life in college while living with him. Never had she ever thought everything would become so hard for them. Never had she ever thought she would start to fall out of love with him. Wasn't he supposed to be the love of her life?

Technically, she wasn't even with him anymore. They had a sort of fall-out, which she knew was completely his fault, yet he argued with her. She was devastated after it happened. He wasn't the type of guy to do something like that. She felt like ever since she became older, she wasn't enough for him. It was like he wanted more. Was she not good enough for him? That was what it felt like to her.

She was hoping they'd work things out later, but she wasn't sure she could forgive him for what he did. She wanted to, but it was so out of character. She felt like she didn't even know him anymore if he was willing to do something like that to her, and then try to justify it. She would have went softer on him if he didn't try to justify why it wasn't even that bad.

"It's like a dream to see your pretty face again, babe."

Her eyes widened. She knew that voice all too well. It was one she heard during her teenage years quite frequently. The brother of the dead girl, AKA her former best friend who was murdered. Jason DiLaurentis was his name, and he was a rebellious drinker... who happened to be devilishly handsome.

"Hi," she greeted awkwardly. "You're in New York! What brought you here? I thought you were planning on driving wherever your heart wanted to go. That was the last I heard of you. A week before graduation day for me..."

"Pennsylvania wasn't my place to be," Jason DiLaurentis explained with a small smile on his face. "I did drive. Then I got tired of driving. It was too much change for me. I needed a place to stick with. I ran into my ex Cece, and I'm staying with her here. Plus, she provides me with action every now and then, you know what I'm saying?" He winked at her.

"You're a dirty man," she playfully commented. "So, you and Cece are back together, huh? I always thought it was over for good."

Jason scoffed and said, "No way in hell that I'm getting back with that bitch, Montgomery! Never said I was with her again. We hooked up. I like her body, not her personality. Well, I like her personality as a friend. I know what she's like as a girlfriend, and I don't want that."

"That's a little sleazy, isn't it?" Aria asked.

"I stopped caring about shit a long time ago," Jason responded. "I don't think love and relationships are my thing. I'm more of a do 'em and ditch 'em kind of guy."

Aria laughed nervously and commented, "That's wonderful."

"You don't really believe that's wonderful, Princess," he read her mind, sipping a drink. "What the hell are you doing at a bar, anyways? I thought Prince Charming would keep you locked up in the bedroom for frick-fracking all night long. A girl like you is the type of girl a guy would wanna do all day."

"Okay, you got dirtier over time," Aria said, furrowing her eyebrows. "I'll assume you're talking about Ezra, so no, he didn't ask me to stay at home with him because... because we're on a break. Things happened, we're separated for the moment, but I know we'll work things out. I just need time to forgive him for what he did."

"Yeah, you guys will fix things," Jason agreed, nodding his head. "You always did. It was just the type of couple you guys were. No matter how big the problem, you found a way back to each other every time. I admired that about you guys. I envied it. I wish I had a relationship with perfect love like that."

"It's not perfect, trust me," Aria told him. "I don't know how we made it look that way, but our relationship is rocky as hell. That doesn't mean I don't love him, though. I do love him, it's just... I can't seem to get over what he did to me."

"What did he do to you?" Jason asked, raising his eyebrows. "Did that bitch hit you? That's not something you should forgive, Aria—"

"Jason," she stopped him, "I know you're trying to be a good guy, but my problems with Ezra are going to remain confidential. I respect his privacy, and I'm sure he doesn't want anybody snooping on our problems. I think our problems are better left with us."

"Okay, I get it, but if it's something serious like abuse, you've got to speak up—" he tried.

"Jason, please," she sternly said his name.

"Alright, fine," Jason muttered, sighing softly. "If you ever want to talk about it, I'm your guy. I may seem like a bag of shit, but I can be a pretty great listener, especially if I'm listening to someone like you." He winked at her.

"I don't get you. Is this your way of flirting with me?" Aria directly asked, folding her arms. "Jason, you're not a bad guy or anything, but I won't stand to be the next Cece in your life that you use for sexual pleasure."

"Whoa there! Slow down, tiger," Jason calmed her down. "I flirt so much that it just comes out when I normally speak. I wasn't trying to make you the next Cece in my life. All I wanted was to let you know that I'm here for you, but I guess it came out in a more flirtatious way than I expected."

Aria smiled and said, "Good, because if you were trying to make me your do 'em and ditch 'em bed buddy, I don't think this friendship would last much longer."

"Friendship?" Jason asked, raising his eyebrows. "Babe, we stopped being friends after that one day during your junior year. Back when you were still dating Fitz. Remember I kissed you? We practically never spoke again, except for a few minor conversations when you and your posse were interrogating me about Alison. The only person in your posse that I really kept speaking with after that day was Spencer, and it's only because she's related to me."

"Jason..." she muttered.

"Oh, I forgot the time when you waved at me!" Jason sarcastically exclaimed. "I told you I'm leaving for good, drivin' around this shitty ass country. Part of me was hoping that you'd tell me I should stay, but none of you guys said anything. Spencer wished me the best, but she's my sister, err, half sister. You didn't even say anything. You waved at me and let me leave."

"Look, I was confused, okay?" Aria snapped. "You kissed me while I was in a relationship! I loved Ezra, but I had all these feelings for you! I didn't want to get mixed up between true love and just temporary infatuation. Don't you see where I'm coming from?"

"But you didn't need to cut me off from your life completely," Jason confidently spoke. "I didn't have to be your romantic lover, or a bed buddy. But I couldn't at least have been your friend? That's where things feel wrong to me."

"I'm sorry," she apologized weakly. "I know it's not good enough, but it's all I can say. I was selfish—I wanted to keep the truth from Ezra. He would have broken up with me if he picked up on the fact that I had feelings for you! I didn't want that to happen."

"Whatever, Aria," he said, shrugging his shoulders. "That was back then, this is now. I'm trying to build a better future for myself, and that's what matters to me now."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: So, in this chapter, I'll be introducing Aria's book. As you read in the summary, she's an aspiring writer. Of course, she's majoring in English and has other goals on her mind, but while she attends NYU, she's writing a book on the side. This book is a romance novel, and she'll continue to write it throughout the story. Her novel has an impact on the decisions she makes, which is why it's important to my story.**

Chapter 2

"I'm waiting right outside the airport!" Aria Montgomery excitedly exclaimed into her cell phone. "Tell me when you step out. I can't wait to see you guys again. I'm so... _so_excited for this moment." Her hazel eyes lit up when she saw a tall brunette stepping out of the New York airport building alongside an even taller male with piercing blue eyes.

Without a word, the shorter girl raced into the taller girl's arms for the longest hug they'd ever had. They stayed in each other's arms happily. It felt like it had been ages since they had seen each other, and it really had. Besides a few phone conversations and small, short visits during breaks, they never got to see each other. However, being apart for college hadn't torn their loving friendship apart. They were still best friends, and they swore to always be.

"Spencer, you look amazing," Aria commented happily, finally letting go of her hold on the brunette. "Oh Toby, you look super handsome. Now, show me the ring, you crazy kids in love. Come on, show it to me!"

Spencer's smile grew wide when she stuck out her hand with the engagement ring for Aria to see. Her body got butterflies when she saw the ring for some reason. She was just so happy for Spencer.

"Toby, you've done her well, my friend," she commented, trying to hold back how widely she was smiling on the inside. "This ring is absolutely beautiful."

"Well, I've had this ring purchased since your senior year," he told her with a proud smile. "I saved up with all my carpentry jobs. You guys were wondering why I was always doing jobs, and this is why. I took as many jobs as possible to save up for the ring. I needed it to be perfect, and I think it is."

"You are the definition of a romantic, Mister Cavanaugh!" Aria exclaimed.

He laughed modestly before Spencer said, "Speaking of romantics, what happened to Mister Ezra Fitz? I thought you said your sweet little lover would be coming to the airport with you. Is he still in the car? I want to see that man again! It's been damn forever."

Aria laughed nervously before saying, "Well, I don't know if you'll be seeing him this trip. At least, not with me."

"What?" Spencer asked, confused. "Is he out for business again?"

"No, no, he's here in town, but we're kind of... on a break," Aria confessed.

"Aria! Why am I just hearing about this?" Spencer asked, baffled. "You always tell me what's going on between you and Fitz. What the hell happened this time?"

"It's not worth talking about, Spence," Aria told her. "It's not relevant. We'll probably work it out soon. Right now, we should be planning your stay!"

"Wait, where are you staying?" Toby asked, scratching his head. "I thought you lived with him. Please don't tell me you're sleeping at the bus stop or—"

Aria laughed and said, "No, Toby. I'm staying at my old apartment. I took a few of my belongings. If Ezra and I are really over, then I'm going have to figure out how we'll separate, but I still believe in us. I've always believed in us. But don't worry, the apartment has plenty of space. I'll take the smaller bedroom, and you two can have the master bedroom. Just please don't have sex, okay? I sleep there."

"Aria!" Spencer cried, putting her hand on the tiny girl's mouth.

"Hey, why be crammed when you can stay at La Casa de Jason?" the tall blond male asked with a smirk as he walked up to the group of friends.

"Jason! What are you doing here?" Aria asked.

"Come on, Aria. She's my blood. I know when my sister's coming to town, I just didn't tell her that I would be here, too," Jason said with a smug smile.

"_Jase_!" Spencer exclaimed, giving her half-brother a big hug. "I've missed you. I can't believe you're staying in New York. Aria, you didn't tell me that Jason would be here!"

"Well, I found out recently, and I forgot to mention it over the phone," she said, biting her lip. "I don't understand how he got the details of when you guys were coming—"

"I've got my ways. Don't you worry your pretty little mind, babe," he said with a smirk. "But what do you say to my offer? Staying at Jason's crib is better than a musty old apartment. There's a pool, hot tub, flat screen TV. I've really been living the life."

"Um, you said you were staying with Cece when we last spoke," Aria said confusedly.

"Okay, well, technically it's Cece's place, but the details don't matter," Jason said, shrugging his shoulders. "Point is, I've got a place for you guys to crash and chill in, so you can either take it or leave it. She's vacationing in Cancun with her new boyfriend, so the house is all mine. It's getting a bit lonely, and I think some company is overdue."

"Thank you for being a great big brother, Jase," Spencer said, pecking his cheek. "Toby, let's get the luggage into the car."

As soon as the two of them left, Aria angrily demanded, "Why are you doing this for us?"

"She's my sister, he's my future half-brother-in-law... well, if that's even a thing," Jason said, making himself laugh. "Anyways, I'm just trying to be a good guy here. I don't see why you have a problem with it, babe. You get to chill in my pool. Plus, I know you're probably having a rough time because of Ezra, and you shouldn't have to stay in an apartment."

"I don't know if you're being nice or if you secretly have an ulterior motive, but I don't want Spencer and Toby to resent this trip because of my crappy apartment, so we'll go with your amazing-sounding house," Aria gave in.

"That's what I thought," Jason said, smirking.

* * *

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, what are you doing?" Jason asked, walking into the office room of the big house that belonged to Cece. "You better not mess this place up, Aria."

"Calm down, a few papers and my laptop won't do any harm," Aria brushed it off, and ran a hand through her dark brown hair.

"What is this, anyways?" Jason asked curiously, stepping closer to the desk where she was sitting.

_Ariel pressed a gentle kiss to Ed's lip before whispering, "I love you, and I always will." Her hands reached for the buttons of his shirt..._

Jason began laughing before asking, "Hold up... is this a porno scene about you and Ezra or something? Never thought you were the type for kinky games like that."

"Shut up!" Aria yelled, crossing her arms. "This is my book, actually. It was inspired by the romance between Ezra and I. Obviously, Ariel represents myself, and Ed represents him, but the elements of the story are very different than our life."

"Yeah, I wasn't really listening, but I still know that you're writing a porno scene about yourself. Why don't you include the incredibly sexy Jeremy D.? He'd like a threesome, or maybe a one-on-one with Ariel," Jason joked, grinning.

"As weird as that is, maybe Jeremy could be a new character!" Aria exclaimed excitedly. "Ever since my break up with Ezra, I haven't been able to write this story. The main plot of it was supposed to be the romance between Ariel and Ed, but what if they're not really soul mates? What if Jeremy is her true soul mate? Bad boy Jeremy—"

"Wait... so you think I'm your soul mate, then?" Jason joked, grinning again.

"Fine, I'll change the name. I just needed a new character for Ariel to fall in love with," Aria said, rolling her eyes. "Love triangles are all the rage, anyways. And it's not about you. It'll be my dream guy... someone who's absolutely perfect for Ariel, and makes her start to wonder if Ed isn't everything she wanted after all. It's tragically beautiful."

"Okay, well if there's no sexy Jeremy threesome, then I'm out," he said, walking out of the office room.

Even though Aria said she wanted to make a different character, she already had her mind set on Ariel's new love interest.

_Interrupting Ed and Ariel's passionate kiss was a tall blond male—Jeremy Dalen._

* * *

**Note- Ezra will be making his first appearance in the next chapter!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Give Ezra a good welcome, because he's back! And of course, we'll be seeing more of Aria's book, and the way she struggles with writing a story between Ed, Jeremy, and Ariel. Plus, there's Spoby, because I couldn't help but write in some of their cuteness!**

Chapter 3

"How was your sleep, Montgomery?"

Stepping inside of one of Cece's classy bedrooms was Jason, giving the brunette a smirk. He folded his arms in the doorway before saying, "I see you're awake, Aria."

"Thanks for letting me stay here and all, but what are you doing!" Aria yelled, groaning. "It's like eight in the morning, and I like to sleep."

"Well, you're dandy in the morning," Jason joked, rolling his eyes. "I came to deliver the message—you've got a visitor this morning. Maybe you'd like to come down to the main hall and see who it is."

"I look like shit," she said, sighing.

"You look lovely," Jason told her, giving her a hand out of bed. "Plus, I'm sure he won't mind. I don't think he's in any position to care, anyways."

"He?" Aria questioned. "It's Ezra, isn't it?"

Jason laughed and responded, "Unfortunately, the devil has came to my doorstep. Well, Cece's, but she's not here... Anyways, he was calling the house phone all morning. I guess he found out you're staying here, but I'll make a promise that I didn't tell him anything."

"I miss him," Aria said, frowning. "I'm disappointed he's here, but I'm glad he is, too. This is our chance to make things right again."

He opened the front door without saying a word to her. In the doorway was a distraught Ezra Fitz. He looked up, his face lighting. His eyes widened, and he was searching for the right words to say.

"A...Aria, hi," he mumbled softly.

"Hello, Ezra," she muttered, and things couldn't have felt weirder to her.

"I haven't been able to stop thinking about you," he told her sincerely. "You haven't come home, and I'm just so lost without you. The house feels empty, and I... I feel so crappy for what I did to you, and... I admit I was wrong. I shouldn't have even argued about it."

"Hola, Fitzy," Jason suddenly greeted. "Would you like to join us for breakfast?"

"Of course!" Ezra exclaimed, stepping inside. "Aria, I need to have a word with Jason. Can you give us a second?" She nodded her head suspiciously and joined Spencer and Toby in the kitchen.

"Why is she sleeping over at your house?" Ezra demanded, folding his arms. "I don't think this is appropriate. We may be fighting right now, but she's still my girl. Why are you taking advantage of her?"

"Whoa, hold back with the accusations, sir," Jason said, his eyes widening. "That's a hell of crap you just accused me of. First of all, I was inviting my sister and her fiancé to stay over, and Aria happens to be my sister's friend. The only reason she's staying here is because whatever shit you did to her made her not want to go home to you, so blame your own ass."

Ezra sighed and said, "You're right, I'm sorry. I'm an idiot."

"We can let this go because I'm a nice guy," Jason smirked. "So, what'll you have for breakfast? Cece's so rich, she's got a buffet waiting in the dining hall slash kitchen. Omlet for you, Ezra?"

* * *

"Thank you for letting me have breakfast, Jason," Ezra thanked, wiping his face with a napkin.

"My pleasure, Fitz," he said, relaxing back in the chair. "Would you like anything or else, or can we start cleaning up?"

"I'm all done here," Ezra said.

"We're done, too," Spencer announced. "There's so much of New York to explore. I am literally planning the whole day for us. And our planning includes visiting Times Square, which is a place I've always wanted to go to!"

"She's not lying when she says she's mapping it—she's literally got it planned down to the second," Toby laughed, putting his arm around his fiancé.

"Well, there's so much to do here, and I need to make sure we get to do it all before our trip is over," Spencer explained. "We'll head out in an hour."

"Great, I have time to take a shower before we go," Aria said, but looked up at Ezra, who was awkwardly sitting there. "I'm going to grab one. I'll see you guys in a bit. Um... where's the shower?"

"Go ahead and use the master bathroom," Jason told her. "It's up the stairs, to your right. Cece's got some nice stuff here, including the shower. It's like living in luxury."

She smiled at him before walking up. Ezra, not being able to resist, got up from the table without a word, and followed her. She felt his presence behind her, and turned around, folding her arms.

"Do you need something, Ezra?" Aria asked, raising her eyebrows.

"Let's not do this ice cold crap," he told her, putting his hands on her waist. "I love you, Aria, and I know I acted stupidly, but that doesn't change the fact that I love you. Please, I was wrong. I just want you to forgive me again. I want us to go back to the way we were."

"How can we do that?" Aria asked, almost sobbing. "I look at you in a whole new way after you did what you did, and it's not a good way!"

"Aria, there's not a second that I don't regret what I did to you," Ezra told her, cupping her cheeks. "I can do better this time. We're soul mates, we always have been. You know we belong together. We're the ones with young love. We're the ones that have epic love. We've always been destined to end up together, and I promised you that I would fight for you until the day I die. I love you so much, Aria."

She stared at the floor, not knowing how to respond. She wanted to make things right with Ezra, but she also wanted to let him go. What he did was just a terrible thing, and she hated to think about it. If she saw him every day, she'd always think about it. But, they had so much history together, and it was true that she always believed that they were meant to be. Ever since they got serious back when she was in high school, she started to believe that they would be together in the end. She had never experienced the feeling of loving somebody romantically until she met him.

"I'm an ass to put this kind of a decision on you on the spot," Ezra muttered, shaking his head. "Meet me at the restaurant we went to the first night we came to New York, and I'll know you still want to be together. You have the whole day to think about it. Eight PM, I'll be the guy in the tuxedo, dying to see his love. If you don't show up, I'll know it's over between us for good. Okay?"

She didn't say anything, but he walked out of Cece's house without another word to her. Leaving her there, she knew she had a big decision to make by eight o' clock.

* * *

_Ed slid her a sheet of paper with a time written on it. Ariel's hands trembled as she accepted it from him. _

_After reading it carefully, she asked, "What's this supposed to mean?"_

_"Meet me tonight," he whispered into her ear. "I'm sorry for getting so angry about Jeremy. I don't want you to tell me now. Tell me tonight if your kiss with him meant anything."_

_Ariel furrowed her eyebrows and mumbled, "We should be over."_

_"But I love you, and I know you love me, too," Ed said, wrapping his arms around her. "We've always been meant to be, and all I need is your assurance tonight that we're on the same page. What you have with Jeremy could never replace what we have together. We're special together, Ariel. Better than anyone. We could rule the world."_

_She began, "I—"_

_"No, don't even think about answering me now," Ed said, shaking his head. "Meet me tonight, and we can discuss everything. I want to be with you."_

_Ed exited the mansion, leaving a confused Ariel there. She didn't know if she was going to show up to see Ed, but after pondering it, she knew he was the one. Jeremy was a fling, and nothing more. She couldn't possibly feel the emotional love that she felt when she connected intimately with Ed. She certainly had passion and chemistry with Jeremy, but Ed was her love._

_It all seemed clear at that moment. She was going to pick Ed._

_"Was that who I think it was?"_

_Turning around, she saw Jeremy Dalen entering her mansion. Her eyes widened. She was hoping this didn't make her change her mind about choosing to be with Ed._

_"If you mean Ed, then yes," Ariel responded._

_"I figured," he said, nodding his head. "What did he want?"_

_"He wanted me to meet him tonight, and he wanted to rekindle our broken relationship," Ariel told him. "He's forgiven me for kissing you, so I think it's time you and I get over whatever we had. I'm meant to be with Ed."_

_"How are you so sure?" Jeremy asked. "Wouldn't you like to test the waters?"_

_"No," Ariel said confidently. "I can't deny that I liked you, Jeremy, but he's the one I want to be with. I love him. We shouldn't have happened."_

_"Don't call us a mistake, Ariel," Jeremy pleaded. "I wouldn't take back a thing about us. In fact, I don't want to give you up like this. You expect me to sit here and let you choose to be with Ed?"_

_"I do!" Ariel cried. "It's only right. You don't really want to be with me, anyways. It's all infatuation. He loves me, and he wants to dedicate himself to me. You don't."_

_"I don't just want to be with you, I want to dedicate my whole life to you," Jeremy whispered into her ear, kissing it lightly. "Don't go back to Ed. Stay with me, we can run away together. We can do anything."_

_"Jeremy..." she moaned, trying to resist._

_"Ariel," he whispered, "come here, and don't let me go."_

_Looking into Jeremy's eyes, Ariel kissed him passionately. She started to undo the buttons on his shirt, her mouth meeting his again. And she didn't even feel stupid for wanting to sleep with him. It was like Ed wasn't on her mind anymore... it was all about Jeremy in her head._

"Aria?" Jason called.

"Oh, hey," she mumbled.

"Writing your porn novel again, huh?" Jason joked, half-smiling at her, which caused her to roll her eyes playfully, "Spencer and Toby wanted to have a romantic evening together, so they went out for dinner. At least you got to spend the afternoon."

"I don't mind," Aria said, getting up. "I'm meeting with Ezra for dinner as well."

"Leaving me all alone?" Jason asked, sighing. "I thought you were done with him, for whatever ass-ish thing he did to you."

"It's complicated," she told him, shaking her head. "You wouldn't understand."

"Sweetheart, I'm the definition of complicated," Jason laughed. "If anybody can understand someone complicated, it's me. I've had a hell of a complicated life. Everything I've been through has been hell after hell."

"To make things simple, Ezra cheated on me," Aria confessed.

"What?" Jason gasped. "That dick."

"No, it's not like that," Aria defended. "He was drunk, and... yeah. He didn't mean to do it, and he loves me, so I'm going to go tell him I'm ready to get back together with him."

"Maybe you should sit down and think about what you're doing, Aria!" Jason cried, his eyes widening. "You're letting the cheater back into your life."

"Do I have some doubts? Yes, but I don't doubt that he loves me," Aria told him. "We have always been meant to be. He and I have real love together."

"Maybe you're just still hung up on your first love," Jason tried. "I couldn't let the first girl I loved back in high school go... Cece. We would go back and forth, and back and forth, but I finally decided that it shouldn't have been so hard. We broke up for the last time, and being friends, with occasional benefits, was so much easier. I like her a lot better as a friend."

"I can't forget about how much we went through to get where we are," Aria told him. "We've fought so hard to be together, and I don't want to just give that all up."

"It's a learning experience," Jason said, and leaned close to her. "You've gotta move on. If he cheated on you, he's no good."

Aria looked up and saw his eyes. She wanted to kiss him... and she did.

"Whoa," he whispered, pulling back slowly. "Why?"

"I'd like to see where things go," she quietly explained. "It's a learning experience, isn't it?"

Jason smiled at her before leaning back in to kiss her again. His hands moved from her waist up to the zipper on her dress. She stood up, turning around for him. He unzipped her dress slowly, and kissed down her back, causing her to shiver. He turned her back around and crashed his lips against hers.

Slowly, they discarded more articles of clothing, and everything was a hot mess after that. But Aria didn't think it was a hot mess that she would regret. And she never would.


End file.
